Sunday, February 20, 2011

Domestic Archaeology

Having finally emptied my bookshelves (books, CDs and DVDs filling a total of 30 boxes), I've moved onto that part of packing involving rummaging around in boxes and cupboards that haven't seen the light of day since the last move.

It started with the discovery of an 'easter egg' in the packaging of my copy of MS Office 2004 for Mac, as blogged here. All that came to pass afterward was recorded on twitter, and by recorded on twitter I mean I spammed the crap out of my follower's timelines. Extracted and provided below, for your perusal;

  • What day is it?
  • You've had your banana, back into the breach, maggot.
  • Yes, you just smashed your head. Sit the fuck down.
  • OMG, Apple made the packaging on MS Office hipster and cool; toad town hall terraium?! -
  • That felt good.
  • I just found another tooth, and I know this one didn't come from me.
  • And a spent bullet casing.
  • Found my Red vs Blue stickers yesssssssssss!
  • Shit, nearly dropped the water buffalo.
  • Found mask from Buenos Aires. Shall not be taking it off for the rest of the day. Badass warrior packing FIGHT!

  • Required: Masquerade Ball, STAT.
  • Found: story books made in Prep. This one is about poo. Not the honey-eating bear kind.
  • Found: old diary.........................................................................yeah, I'mma stop reading and shove it in a box NOW.
  • I have hunger. Feed me.
  • My twitter feed is full of anti-old-diary activists. I defy you! Now hush, I'm reading 16 year old angst, hot damn it's bad.

  • Primary school diaries!
  • Found: letter I wrote to myself when 11 years old because no one else would write to me. It is very short.
  • In primary school, I made stories about explorers and yetis, sharks, dinosaurs, and magic ants. And dinosaurs. Also, dinosaurs.
  • 6 year old Tessa illustrated her grade prep work book with drawings of...Asterix.
  • My freaking darlings, sheepish apologies for spamming the crap out of twitter today. I go now to make my fortune/find dinner. As you were.
I also found old letters and post cards from people who weren't me (seriously!), and picture story books I'd made in school, and old school projects, and photos, and had myself a gay old time.

With various blogs, diaries and journals, I have an account of my life going back to 11 years old. Reading them is both hard, humiliating and hilarious, and in many instances, surprisingly dull for the drama being written about. Some find this dedication to documentation alarming, especially the fact that I keep it all. These are external memory devices. Just as you carry a USB stick about with all your photos and important documents on, I take cart these old books from home to home. One day my memory will start to fade, and I will have these as the back up of my mind.

That said, if ever I go into politics? They're going up in a bonfire.

Then I chatted to Ben Peek for a bit, and when the opportunity was presented I gleefully pointed out to him that I am not 32, 33, no, I am 29 years old. There's nothing quite so brattishly satisfying as pointing out to your older friends that you're not just younger than them, you're younger than them.

Having recorded my life since 11, that means I have 18 years worth of documentation. That's more than half my life.

Most of it has nothing to do with pants, either. How odd.


  1. You know, the advantage of being significantly older than someone (not just older but older is that it commands respect. I'm not sure from whom, but I'm sure I'll see it some day. I have sufficient accumulated years for LOTS.

    PS I have a skull you can put the teeth into, if you're desperate.

  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  3. Old lady failed at html. Let's try that again!

    So there.

  4. Gillian, I don't think your pa would appreciate some of these teeth. They've dried out and cracked.

    Gold, Jaime, goooold.

  5. Wow! This was like reliving my day too!

    >Most of it has nothing to do with pants, either. How odd

    Somehow this does not surprise me...

  6. I had to take some spring cleaning =D

  7. you know, like, really, you're not that much younger than me and, like, like, like, you'll be here soon enough.


  8. I'll always be younger than you though. ^_____^