Monday, June 29, 2009

Going Postal

Two boxes landed today; one expected, one not.

The delightful explorer Madame Bishop sent me an 'oddity', a mini-version of a festival mask for Phi Ta Khon. It's quite a fearsome mask. Bit of rabbit, bit of hawk, bit of shark, a lot of unsettling. In the card, Madame Bishop notes that the shop had these displayed on Ken and Barbie dolls. Heh. I have no Barbies, but I do have the Masterchief, who has kindly volunteered to model.

I think he looks quite fetching.

There was also a bottle opener decorated with what look like Chinese opera masks. It is just as alarming to look at. I may never get to open a bottle of fun with it, because the opener will look at me every time I go to use it.

Second box contained an uncorrected proof of Jeff VanderMeer's Finch, which I had the honour of reading as manuscript and telling him everything he was doing wrong. I read it in one day. It's a powerful book, that. Powerful enough to keep 46 degrees of summer out of my head, which is no small feat. Brilliantly written and very juicy. There's a lot to love.

There was also a wrapped thingy, with a card taped to it. On the back of the envelope was a request to document my reaction. At which point I put everything down, didn't even open the card and went off to do all my chores. Sounded far too distracting.

Now I'm opening it...

Oh holy hell!




Waitwaitwaitwaitwait. Ages ago. Like, ages ago. I flippantly requested a capybara for my birthday. I wasn't really expecting a capybara, because Australia has strict quarantine laws, and I have nowhere for a capybara to live. But when requesting presents you're never going to receive, you might as well do it properly.

Apparently this infected Jeff, 'cause he had a capybara dream, started RPing a capybara on a certain-social-networking-site-that-looks-like-a-cubicle-farm, and the internet coughed up a capybara to talk to him, who he then went on to interview. (ZOMFG, teh kewt.)

But, I did not receive a capybara for my birthday.

Got the next best thing though!

And this is my head asploding with the combined pressure of Oarsum Unsettling and Mighty Cute.


Thank you, Madame Bishop! Thank you, VanderMeer Inc! Thank you, Caplin Rous!


  1. Capybara birthday greetings! How very splendid!

    Though I am merely human, may I offer my own birthday felicitations, pale though they are beside the greeting from the World's Largest Rodent.

  2. Anonymous29/6/09 12:27

    Wish I could have been there to see your reaction, but the photo is great! You are very welcome!

    Ann V.

  3. Hi Tessa! Glad you liked my photo and I hope you had a happy birthday. I am sorry you can't have a pet capybara in Australia. I think you should move. But until then, I am willing to be your virtual pet capybara. Just let me know when you want another photo so I can participate in your celebrations.

    Oh, instead of cake or other dessert foods, I prefer blueberry yogurt.

    Caplin Rous

  4. Anonymous29/6/09 15:39

    Heh, you're welcome. More like it re-awakened my dormant but lifelong obsession with capybaras. And good thing, too, because otherwise I'd never have found Caplin Rous!!

    That stuff from Kirsten looks awesome.

  5. Of course, Mister Barnes! I am most humbled by the gesture. : )

    Ann, Jeff, you two are ridiculous. Totally. It's OARSUM. :D



    Blueberry yoghurt it is, absolutely.

  6. If that capybara were in Thailand, with the multicoloured thingo around its neck, it would clearly be a *sacred* capybara.
    The mask looks much better on the Masterchief than on Barbie!

  7. I dunno, I think Barbie has the legs to carry it off. ; ) Thank you again, the MC and mask are still standing on my desk, heh.