When I started talking to people, they'd nod, look up, and their whole face would change. Whatever I was saying was overridden with "are you alright?"
Yes. Actually, I am.
I've felt pretty good the last couple of weeks. Solid. Not unraveling. Not crazy. Good enough to make a statement about being good and not fear that the World probably has my blog on an RSS feed and will take that revelation as a challenge and do its best to render that very statement invalid.
Which triggers this reaction in people, this sudden and sincere concern, followed by a second question as clearly I'm giving off some horrible vibe that cannot be reassured away with a simple "yeah".
Very few people actually asked that when I wasn't alright. I'm pretty sure I'm not horrendously ugly right now. Methinks I'm so good at camouflaging my state of mind that I broadcast that which is not; ergo, now I'm okay, people are convinced I'm SERIOUSLY NOT WELL.
Maybe I should start wearing make up or something. Maybe that'd help.
you always been pretty, dear.
ReplyDeleteBut never as pretty as you.
ReplyDeleteI borrowed your craziness. You can have it back now.
ReplyDeletewell all right for okay!
ReplyDeleteAw, sorry about that Gillian. Guess it has a long incubation period, given I last saw you, what, a month ago?
ReplyDeleteIt was a long term borrowing. I was in much need of craziness. If it wasn't so very homesick for you, I might keep it. It keeps on complaining though, that its true home is in your brain and that my brain is too full of hot air. It says it can't sleep properly.
ReplyDeleteI wonder what Australia Post would answer if I asked about the best way of sending it?
They probably wouldn't bat an eyelid - rain, hail or shine and all that.
ReplyDeleteYou could always pay the crazy forward, you know, let it get out and see the world. Hand it to someone who really needs some crazy for a bit. (Please?)
How about we package it nicely and send it to the Vandermeers? They don't know me, so I'm safe from recrimination and they do know you and so would treasure your craziness.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't wish the crazy on anyone, to be honest, and I'm sad you copped some. Hopefully it goes away soon. : /
ReplyDeleteIt's not just you, if that helps.
ReplyDeleteHeh! That's funny, thanks Dave!
ReplyDeleteDInosaur Comics makes everything better!
ReplyDelete