Est. 2002 - BRINGING YOU THE VIEWS OF TESSADOM
I think if you took up smoking a pipe, the beard would feel more at ease and maybe would grow faster.
Yes, and maybe a Sherlock Holmes-style hat. And a smoking jacket with elbow patches. You could re-use it all for the steampunk crowd. JeffV
No no no, you need baggy jeans, a long flannel shirt, and a dirty trucker's cap. Only then will your beard grow!
I recommend a year long retreat in a remote monastery in the Himalayas, where you will spend 20 hours a day mastering the arcane arts of Unix hackery. Then when you reveal yourself to the mailinglists of the world in a flurry of patches, the beard will spring into existence fully formed. (The growing thing obviously isn't working, hence the importance of this plan to skip that step and go straight to fully formed beard.)
............but I don't want to!